I haven’t blogged since Monday…god. Monday I went to class, and then we got drunk..it wasn’t too fun. I kept saying towlie quotes and tripping out on this shoe–I don’t remember much, but it wasn’t orgasmically fun. Tuesday we watched movies and recuperated from the night before, I went home and worked on my paper until 1:30 in the morning. The next morning I got up and got ready, packed everything, and my dad and I drove into town. He waited for three hours while I typed my English paper, he was not happy. Got The Doom Generation from Molly, handed in my paper, and we started driving. I was wearing my suit jacket, bondage top, and black tie. My philosophy teacher was walking by and went “that works, that works.” It was really strange. We drove and drove and drove, took 101 down to Sacramento. I started playing with his GPS, put my discman’s batteries in it. We got there, I called my cousin Kelly, and like, Michael and I went over to Kelly’s house (me obsessively using the GPS to track everything). Dan was over, and I met the dude that lives there too, Jared. He’s cool, he wears makeup and has long hair, wears black, shaves his eyebrows–he’s cool. Well, Dan had to go home, and Taggart came over.
Categories: Uncategorized
- Published:
- November 27, 2003 – 5:49 pm
- Author:
- By A.
Whoa! Tara sent me some gravy pentagram tattoos–delicious. I have to buy shoes though–and I can’t find anywhere to get my ears pierced again–I guess it’s good that I’m going to Sacramento on Thursday.
Categories: Uncategorized
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- November 24, 2003 – 1:06 pm
- Author:
- By A.
I can’t stand that Deanna character. She revolts me. Her, in a sarcastic voice ten minutes ago: “You look nice today.” Die. Die slowly. And she has one of my CDs.
Categories: Uncategorized
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- November 24, 2003 – 1:01 pm
- Author:
- By A.
I think I’m dead–my paper is due in two days and I haven’t even wrote the plan for it yet. I must ask the librarian lady why I can’t access Proquest off-campus.
Categories: Uncategorized
- Published:
- November 24, 2003 – 12:59 pm
- Author:
- By A.
> Nine Inch Nails – Last
> Placebo – Scared Of Girls
> Marilyn Manson – I Want To Disappear
Woke up early, got dressed in my suit jacket and black silk tie, listened to Massive Attack until I got to school, slept in the Drift Office until about ten, then popped in the new CD I made last night and went over to Danielle’s. Christine was over there, I called Sun Seekers, and they said they don’t do piercings any more…wierd. Y Liquors raised the price of the vodka we were going to get, but I don’t really care, I’ll pay for it anyway. I’m embarking on a profitable escapade of selling cigarettes. I love it, people will pay a 300% markup just because they’re too lazy to go buy their own. Left Danielle’s house, went to go do errands. I cashed my mom’s money order she sent me and bought a bottle of turpentine, buttons for my pants, my hair dye, The Matrix on DVD, some small locks, and something else. Christine got me my b-day present today! It was a tea kettle, it’s cool. And she got me some of this really yummy tea she had one day. I saw Tawna walking to the college when I was coming back from my errands and talked with her and her friend until we got there. I came back after my errands , and Christine and Danielle had completely cleaned out Danielle’s room. It was cool. I put my stuff in my bag, and walked over to the college to work on my research paper. That’s what I should be doing right now, but I’m blogging instead.
Categories: Uncategorized
- Published:
- November 24, 2003 – 12:49 pm
- Author:
- By A.
Oh–an e-mail from Molly–it was super-cute as always, brightened my day. She was too crushed with boredom to go anywhere. I’m not sure if I would have gone somewhere if I could have.
Categories: Uncategorized
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- November 23, 2003 – 10:44 pm
- Author:
- By A.
Tonight sucks, I’ve been eating constantly–mostly frozen corn, toast, rasins, anything I can get my hands on. Watched South Park for a while, there was a funny one about a porno tape and Lord Of The Rings. And I love towlie! Bored still–Molly never saved me. Oh well. Trying to subject myself to The Rules Of Attraction, then I think I’m going to dose myself with NyQuil and go to sleep.
Categories: Uncategorized
- Published:
- November 23, 2003 – 10:41 pm
- Author:
- By A.
Bjork – Army Of Me
Went into the bathroom to admire myself again–took out my contacts–there is no hope of escaping this carrion pit of ennui. Ate dinner, we had some weird stir-fry thing, we watched thirty minutes of Blood Work until another horse show came on. Washed the dishes–slowly realizing I’m just going to have to endure until 9:30. I’ve been staying up until like 2:00 AM, so to make my Monday better I’m going to dose myself with NyQuil at 9:30 so I get a full night’s sleep. I should get some sleeping pills if I go to Rite-Aid tomorrow. I have so much stuff to do tomorrow, but it’s going to be fun. I think I’ll archive my list:
See if Y Liquors has shot glasses
Get turpentine, buttons, and a palette at Ben Franklin
Return these clasps I bought at Ace, and get a little lock for a bracelet I’m making
Get good nail polish remover, sleeping pills, and CD labels at Wal-Mart
Get hair dye and eyeliner at En Vogue
Get my ears pierced at Sun Seekers
Categories: Uncategorized
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- November 23, 2003 – 5:58 pm
- Author:
- By A.
Instead of the usual insipid political shows my dad usually watches, now he watches this thing called RFD TV, where it’s basically horse videos 24/7. I’m trying to decide which is worse: ersatz political debate or horse videos. I’m surprising myself, but I’m leaning toward horse videos. At least the people on the horse videos have no agenda, and they really are experts in their field–literally.
Categories: Uncategorized
- Published:
- November 23, 2003 – 5:45 pm
- Author:
- By A.
I’m so bored I’ve just been putting on makeup, fixing my hair, and admiring myself in the mirror. I just noticed that I am SO vain. I do look pretty though, I’ve been getting dressed and prettifying myself all day long. It’s really depressing…there’s nobody around to appreciate it. Molly e-mailed me and mentioned that she was really bored and thinking of going to Fred Meyer–I sent her an e-mail begging her to take me with her. I’m taking the written test to get my license tomorrow, I NEED to be able to drive, for no other reason other than this oppressive boredom. So bored. This is like my fourth post about my boredom. My dad came up to me and said that he had an $80 phone bill from me talking to my mom. My mom is such an imbecile, she thinks that if I call her on her cell phone, I don’t have to pay anything. Such a dumbfuck, how the hell did I ever get brains–it must skip a generation. My dad can say anything he wants, I’m talking to my mom whenever I feel like it–if he’s so concerned with his phone bill he can switch to unlimited minutes for–well if I was online I’d check it out, but I’m staying off on the one thousand in one chance that Molly will take pity on my boredom and take me with her to Fred Meyer’s. I hate my father. I noticed last week that a piece of paper that said “you revolt me” that I put on my door was gone. I can’t imagine him ripping it off in disgust–I can’t imagine him displaying any facsimile of an emotion–but I know he took it off. What a passive-agressive little shit. How the fuck did I ever get emotions? It must skip a generation. Maybe he’s mad at me for wearing makeup. It must be something petty like that. There was no mail today–I’m giving up hope on a card from Aunt Gail. I really should write these people letters, but I’m too lazy. I don’t really love any of the people on my mom’s side of the family, except for my grandma, even though she is an intolerant bigot. I love my cousin Alexis, but she’s only three, and they haven’t finished their indoctrination of hypocrisy yet. I think I just saw my dad’s girlfriend’s car, but it was going too fast to stop at our driveway and had a weird antenna. I think I love my Aunt Anna, she’s really nice, but her husband Pat said that I was going to get arrested if any cops saw me, so I don’t love him. It’s not his fault, he has dimentia, but it kind of made me mad anyway. I guess I’d love him if he didn’t have dimentia. They lived through such cool stuff, all the wars, all the propaganda campaigns, I wish we could have an amazing, day-long talk: one of those “tell me your life story” things. But, alas, my mom has told me her life story twice in eighteen years, so my chances of them telling me theirs is slim to none. And if I use my dad as an example, he’s never told me anything about his life in 18 years, so that makes me even more pessimistic. I think I’m depressed, I always dress up really nice when I’m depressed, to make me feel better. But then I end up looking in the mirror and end up seeing just a hollow mannequin on display for myself, not a person with human emotions and intellect. I feel hollow–with no soul. And my body is just an ersatz soul, something to dress up and feel pretty, but beauty is just a side effect of reproductive insticts. The world sucks. I think I’m going to take my portable phone and go sit somewhere to contemplate how hollow I really am and why I’m doing what I’m doing at this point in my life.
Categories: Uncategorized
- Published:
- November 23, 2003 – 4:37 pm
- Author:
- By A.