Today was cool, Jordan came over and cut my hair (just the back, it was overgrown), and then we voyaged into town and I worked on the newspaper with everybody for about four hours. We were supposed to go over to Heather’s afterwards, but I didn’t want to, so we didn’t go. We went over to Ben’s instead and hung out with him for a bit. He’s really cool. Um, we went to my house afterwards and fooled around for a while, he gave me a massage, it felt really good. I’ve never had a massage I didn’t like. Kind of like I never met a cookie I didn’t like. Or a cake, to the best of my memory. Hm. Let’s see–Jordan left a few hours ago, I proofread my mom’s paper, ate some food. Jordan is trying to pawn off his gunea pig, he tried to give it to his sister, but she didn’t want it. Oh, the girl that he got it from stole his scissors and gave him back these shitty ones and said they were his. Oh, I had e-mails from Molly and Kelly, I was all “yay.” Kelly said hi on IM but had to go to sleep. That’s what I should be doing, but I think I’m going to go watch TV.

Oh, Molly replied to the e-mail I sent her after the Dan.ielle’s parents incident and it was so great. Her situation and mine are so similar. She asked me if I’d read Dan.ielle’s blog to see what she thought of the situation, and I explained that it would probably piss me off no matter what she said, so I’m just not going to. I just have to say for the record that I think that Dan.ielle is to blame as much as I am in all this. She was the one that made her parents read my journal entries, she was the one that failed to communicate to me in her e-mails anything remotely close to what her parents told me in their tirade. The closest I ever got to what her parents really wanted to say to me was that they were “fucken pissed.” What does “fucken pissed” tell me? My god. True, I was judgemental. But still–her parents are technologically inept and therefore were never even considered as an audience. Their technological ineptitude was another factor in why they were so mad at me. They don’t get that it is IMPOSSIBLE to find my blog on ANY search engine unless you know the exact URL–which would be impossible to just pull out of one’s head. To my knowledge, I never said anything that “threatened [their] family.” I should probably just let this lie, they did threaten to put a hit out on me, or whatever. I need to rant–so don’t read it if you don’t want to see yourselves portrayed in an unflattering light. This is the one phrase that I somehow can’t drill into people’s heads. IF IT PISSES YOU OFF, DON’T READ IT. I’m going to delete every entry that contain both the words “Danielle” and “family.” At least I never have to talk to them again. I was thinking afterwards, “Gosh, Dan.ielle and I had such great times together.” I guess people just grow apart. Our lifestyles weren’t in sync. As one of my friends put it, “[T]hese [accusations] are smokescreens–distractions and redirection away from [...] real problems. Rest assured that in just a few months from now, you and I will be creatively engaged with interesting people and fun things to do, and those others will still be sunk in a negative funk focusing on terrible us and our horrible crimes [...]” She’s probably right. I’m almost sure of it. The one person I’m really worried about is Chri.stine. I talked to a bunch of people at the concert Friday and many of them asked me if I’d talked to Chri.stine and that they can’t get in touch with her. Something is going on–even if it’s as benign as the monopolization of her life by Dan.ielle. From what I’ve heard of Chri.stine’s parents, that’s a good thing. She still has my SLC Punk DVD–I wonder if it would be petty asking her for it back. Fuck, it’s mine. I don’t think she’ll really care. I wonder if she bashes me. It would be the most amusing thing in the world to sit there while they talk about how much of a horrible person I am. How Crescent City. I want to e-mail Christine. Perhaps I’ll wait until the bike incident dies down. I wonder what they want. I would prepare a statement, but it would piss them off more than they’ve ever been pissed off before. It’s horrible to have to grapple with the possibility that one is a bad person, even if it isn’t true. I don’t think her parents are bad people–everybody is misguided. There’s a quote somewhere–let me find it. Hm, can’t find it. It’s something to the effect of people will never do evil so cheerfully than when they think it is in the service of good. Hm. That was completely irrelevant. Hm. Well, I’m going to post this in a week and past-date it to this date (Sunday, Feb 29, 2004 @10:13 PM) in a futile attempt to stop Dan.ielle from reading it. I think I’m going to put periods in her name so it’s not searchable.

Saturday was kind of lame, I drove into town and got my bike back but had to undergo a fifteen-minute diatribe about how I’m the worst person in the world from Danielle’s parents. Hm. I’ll elaborate on my feelings about it later. Um…I think I drove to Wing Wah’s and had lunch, then got groceries and went home. I like driving my car, it’s just become second nature to me. I thought it was going to be hard. Oh yeah, Jordan came over and we went down to Pacific Shores to this one place where I saw this abandoned bucket seat on top of a hill–I had Jordan sit in it and I took pictures. It was in the middle of the night, it should look really cool–but it was ISO 100 so perhaps not a single picture will come out. I’ll take some later during the daytime with some 400 and it’ll come out looking good. After that we came back and watched Y Tu Mama Tambien. Jordan looked lost, so I asked him if he was getting it, and he told me that because of his eye condition he can’t like–focus quickly enough on subtitles before they’re gone, so I narrated the subtitles. I think he liked it–why didn’t he just tell me that he couldn’t see in the beginning? Like I care–I just wanted him to understand the movie. Well, it got over at like one, but due to our collective laziness I don’t think he left until two.

Last night was SO fun. All day I got ready to go, I worked on my hair, worked on my outfit. I did a conditioning treatment on my hair, it felt so luxurious afterwards. I talked to my mom for a while. Lisa complimented me on my prints that I’d left out on the table. My dad and Lisa went to Brookings to go eat dinner. They asked me if I wanted to go, and I told them about the concert, and Lisa sounded really interested. She so would have gone, I think. She’s all about fun, while my dad is all about being a loser. Well anyway, after they left I got to work on spiking my hair. Jordan showed up in the middle of my hair spiking extravaganza–and I was quite bitchy, this one spike wasn’t cooperating. But after exposing the spikes to to the ’surface of the sun’ setting on my hair dryer, they got rigid fast. Jordan kind of dressed himself up–the outfit kind of sucked–but I didn’t have time to dress him, I was preoccupied with my hair. After I got my spikes to stay, I was kind of in a lull, so I decided to make some tea–I needed a pick-me-up. After that, I got all my stuff together in my chinese box, loaded my last roll of 400 film into Lisa’s camera, and we left. I had my tea with me in the car, I was trying to drink it as we drove. Right before we got to Fort Dick Market Jordan’s car ran out of gas, so we had to get out and push it to the gas station. I didn’t want my tea to spill, so I put it on the side of the road, forgetting it until we were well on our way into town. I took a picture of Jordan near his car to comemmorate his first time running out of gas. After pulling over at a phone book to look up the address of the Masonic Temple, we arrived and walked in. I had a thing of change stolen from my dad, $8 to be exact. I was all “do I have to count it out?” and (as always), I love banking on people’s laziness–he just dumped it into the thing with the money and gave us the little mark on our hands. The first band was–okay. Oh yeah, that was Ape Shit. They had some good songs, I think. That annoying Robin came over and accosted me, but the music was loud so I could go “Gosh, I really hate you” with a smile on my face and she didn’t hear a word of it. I ended up finding my crowd though, Amber and Heather such. I saw so many of my friends and acquaintances–Stephanie, Ann, Will, Kate–and various others. The second band, the emo band, was okay. They put on a good show when they actually were playing but spent a lot of time setting up, tuning, etc. between songs. One of them was really hot, if my flash was powerful enough, I got a picture of him. The next band, Stalemate, was okay–they’re always “okay.” This was the only band where I could actually hear the lyrics, and they flagrantly sucked. God, I could write better lyrics than that, and that’s saying something. Anyway, then the last band, The Exploited, set up. They opened up with some garbled words out of the microphone, ending with something that was unavoidably “motherfucker.” The guitars started going, and they filled the room with AMAZING sound. I fucking loved them. Everyone was inspired to ersatz mosh–basically push each other–and I hope I got some good pictures of it, although I had to be at a safe distance for my camera’s sake (perhaps out of flash range though). Well, after the last band me and Jordan left. We went down to Pacific Shores to fool around, and I saw this abandoned chair on top of a hill–it would be an AMAZING shot. When I get some 400 film I’m going down there to take some pictures. I might even go down there with my roll of 200 if it’s a bright day. I have to have Jordan sit in it dressed in some creative way. I want him to look like the king of the underworld, I’m going to dodge his face. It’ll look really creepy. I can’t wait to develop this roll. Well, I went home and went to sleep, it was late when I got back.

Last night was SO fun. All day I got ready to go, I worked on my hair, worked on my outfit. I did a conditioning treatment on my hair, it felt so luxurious afterwards. I talked to my mom for a while. Lisa complimented me on my prints that I’d left out on the table. My dad and Lisa went to Brookings to go eat dinner. They asked me if I wanted to go, and I told them about the concert, and Lisa sounded really interested. She so would have gone, I think. She’s all about fun, while my dad is all about being a loser. Well anyway, after they left I got to work on spiking my hair. Jordan showed up in the middle of my hair spiking extravaganza–and I was quite bitchy, this one spike wasn’t cooperating. But after exposing the spikes to to the ’surface of the sun’ setting on my hair dryer, they got rigid fast. Jordan kind of dressed himself up–the outfit kind of sucked–but I didn’t have time to dress him, I was preoccupied with my hair. After I got my spikes to stay, I was kind of in a lull, so I decided to make some tea–I needed a pick-me-up. After that, I got all my stuff together in my chinese box, loaded my last roll of 400 film into Lisa’s camera, and we were off. I’m going to finish this entry later, I have to go driving with my dad.