the diary of antoine roquentin

This is an entertaining, albeit politically incorrect, diversion.

Ass Hunter flash game – ebaumsworld.com

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I just updated the first page. It now meets with my seal of approval. Enjoy:

http://www.retroviral.net

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> Placebo – Narcoleptic
> Elastica – Never Here
> Placebo – Without You I’m Nothing
> OK Go – Shortly Before The End
> OK Go – Hello My Treacherous Friends

The early-morning melancholy has set in. The world sucks. I made a little progress on my website, I have an early version of the “home” page up. I’m not sure if I like it. I know I like the jump page with the six-pointed star, and the navigation bar on the “home” page, but other than that I don’t know. I stayed up to watch IFC Short Film Collection. It was good, as always. There was this great one about a girlfriend who made her boyfriend act out all the greatest things of their relationship. I’m never going to meet anyone. The world sucks. I’ve been kind of sick this weekend–my hair has been bothering me. I want to shave it or do something to it. But I won’t. It’s just becuase I haven’t done anything to it, that’s why I’m disliking it.

The world sucks. Summer session classes don’t start until June 7. This is going to be hell. I just want to die. I need to go to the doctor to get my throat checked out, but I can’t ask my dad. He just says “What do you need to go to the doctor for?” Loser. I could go to A Street clinic, but I’m afraid of that place. I need someone to go with me. I really want to cry.

Oh, guess who showed up today. Jordan. He was dressed atrociously. Some–I hesitate to call it a shirt–meshy football uniform thing that he later revealed to be an “ICP” shirt, and dirty jeans. Since he works today, I know that he went home and changed before he came over. If he wanted to make a good impression, why did he dress like a fashion-impaired hobo with ADD? What an unabashed loser. I tried my hardest not to be sardonic. And, to prove my theory that he is a complete and utter imbecile, HE TELLS ME THAT I HAVE CHANGED MY BLOG ADDRESS. REALLY? REALLY PEOPLE? WHAT A FUCKING IDIOT. Do I have to hold his hand and give him the address seven times to get him to fucking remember it? If he is stupid enough to fucking forget the address, he deserves to not read it. What a complete, perfectly realized, infinite idiot. He’s all “you put password protection on it.” Yeah, I sure put password protection on it. Yes, you loyal readers–do you remember the password? You’d better. It’s “Jordan is a fucking idiot.” God damn. Enough said.

Well, aside from Liz’s main competition in the field of IQ, not much has been going on. I wish I could hang out with my friends, I miss everybody. Oh, yesterday I stopped by Royce’s house and hung out for a while (FINALLY). It was really nice, I got to see him shirtless. Well, the reason that was cool wasn’t for his rippling pecs (which he doesn’t have) but for his nipple piercings. That is so uber-cool. He talked about how slow buisiness is at the Tattoo Palace, and we pet his dogs and cat. He looked so beautiful. I like his new haircut. He isn’t as insipid as I always thought. He does hate this town! And I probably just looked like a mall goth. I am such a loser. I was wearing my halloween cloak. I don’t deserve someone as cool as Royce. I don’t know if he would take an interest to my interests, but I would imagine he would. I like him. I wish I didn’t dress like a poser, I’m too much of a geek to be hardcore. I need to stop staying up all night. I need to ask Molly about that job she was telling me about. I need to write my coffee shop story. I’m never going to write it. I know it, I think Molly knows it. I quite simply don’t care. I probably should drop Journalism during the summer, but I don’t want to lose all the Drift fringe benefits. I need to e-mail Molly. I must stop being passive-agressive. Eh, I got apathetic towards the end of last semester too but regained my zeal, maybe I’ll rally to do this stuff later. And maybe the sun will nova tomorrow.

Well, at least I have one thing to look forward to, the loving arms of death. I might drive down to the beach in an hour or so. The sun is dawning. I like the beach in the morning. It looks like it always does in my nightmares. Well, my wrist really hurts. I’m going to bed. Check out my site, it’s gravy.

http://www.retroviral.net

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Badger Badger Badger Badger Badger Badger Badger Badger Badger Mushroom! Mushroom! Badger Badger Badger Badger Badger Badger Badger Badger Badger Mushroom! Mushroom! Badger Badger Badger Badger Badger Badger Badger Badger Badger Mushroom! Mushroom! Snake! A snake! Oh no, it’s a snaaaake! Badger Badger Badger Badger Badger Badger Badger Badger Badger Mushroom! Mushroom! Badger Badger Badger Badger Badger Badger Badger Badger Badger Mushroom! Mushroom! Badger Badger Badger Badger Badger Badger Badger Badger Badger Mushroom! Mushroom! Snake! A snake! Oh no, it’s a snaaaake! Badger Badger Badger Badger Badger Badger Badger Badger Badger Mushroom! Mushroom! Badger Badger Badger Badger Badger Badger Badger Badger Badger Mushroom! Mushroom! Badger Badger Badger Badger Badger Badger Badger Badger Badger Mushroom! Mushroom! Snake! A snake! Oh no, it’s a snaaaake! Badger Badger Badger Badger Badger Badger Badger Badger Badger Mushroom! Mushroom! Badger Badger Badger Badger Badger Badger Badger Badger Badger Mushroom! Mushroom! Badger Badger Badger Badger Badger Badger Badger Badger Badger Mushroom! Mushroom! Snake! A snake! Oh no, it’s a snaaaake! Badger Badger Badger Badger Badger Badger Badger Badger Badger Mushroom! Mushroom! Badger Badger Badger Badger Badger Badger Badger Badger Badger Mushroom! Mushroom! Badger Badger Badger Badger Badger Badger Badger Badger Badger Mushroom! Mushroom! Snake! A snake! Oh no, it’s a snaaaake! Badger Badger Badger Badger Badger Badger Badger Badger Badger Mushroom! Mushroom! Badger Badger Badger Badger Badger Badger Badger Badger Badger Mushroom! Mushroom! Badger Badger Badger Badger Badger Badger Badger Badger Badger Mushroom! Mushroom! Snake! A snake! Oh no, it’s a snaaaake! Badger Badger Badger Badger Badger Badger Badger Badger Badger Mushroom! Mushroom! Badger Badger Badger Badger Badger Badger Badger Badger Badger Mushroom! Mushroom! Badger Badger Badger Badger Badger Badger Badger Badger Badger Mushroom! Mushroom! Snake! A snake! Oh no, it’s a snaaaake! Badger Badger Badger Badger Badger Badger Badger Badger Badger Mushroom! Mushroom! Badger Badger Badger Badger Badger Badger Badger Badger Badger Mushroom! Mushroom! Badger Badger Badger Badger Badger Badger Badger Badger Badger Mushroom! Mushroom! Snake! A snake! Oh no, it’s a snaaaake!

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After we finished hanging out at the college, I went over to Charley’s house. We went to Ocean World (he works there) to check the water levels in the tanks. It was so creepy and cool at night. We had this long conversation about zombie movies, which was cool. Then we drove around for a while denouncing Jordan’s existence, then stopped at Gas 4 Less to hang out with one of his friends. Then we went back to his house and played for a while. We watched Duckman and he showed me these glorious websites, like the It’s a Trap! site, and this one t-shirt site, Bounty Hunter:

http://www.bountyhunterinc.com/

When three or four AM rolled around, we started watching Duckman. Then we kind of had sex–and then we realized we had to get up in the morning, so I bid him adieu and drove home. On the way home I had the most GLORIOUSLY STUPID idea ever. I’m all “Why don’t I just go to the beach and watch the sun rise! The problem with that is that the sun rises in the east and sets in the west. God. Well, I went to the beach anyway, because it dawned on me just as I was pulling up, and it was kind of light so I went and took some pictures. There was this pair of pants and boxer briefs just in the sand–it was strange. I tried to take some pictures of the waves. This was around five or six AM. It was really beautiful out there.

I came up with the idea to write a screenplay about how my life revolves around the beach (my nightmares about the waves pulling me out to sea, my mom taking me to the beach as a child, etc.) I still may write it. I need to get back into writing, I haven’t done it in so long. Well, I went back home and my dad was awake. I just went into my room and went to sleep. He said something about Lisa (his girlfriend) coming to feed the horses, but that was it. Woke up around three, missed layout with Molly, so I went up to Smith River to get gas. $20 used to get me close to full, but now it doesn’t. Fucking lame. Well, now I’m at the college and we’re hanging out in the library.

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