> Lords of Acid - Rough Sex
> Lords of Acid - The Most Wonderful Girl
> Lords of Acid - Cybersex
> Moby - Sleep Alone
> Rammstein - Mein Herz Brennt
> Pansy Division - I’m Gonna be a Slut
> Meat Beat Manifesto - Mindstream
> Basement Jaxx - Breakaway
> OK Go - Bye Bye Baby

Poop. It’s 11:23, and instead of doing something constructive (whatever that might be) I’m sitting here listening to Lords of Acid and blogging. I’m inordinately glad Kevin didn’t call me and beg me to come over to his house. He gets so old so fast. He lives in a dream world, he’s so full of all this bullshit about moving to New York and New Orleans, when he can’t even hold down a job. It’s really sad. Oh, something is wrong with the new Drift camera…the little covers on the lens don’t open when you turn the camera on. I think it has something to do with sand wedged into the telescoping lens thingamabob. It was all windy at the beach when I was taking fireworks pics, I guess it must have embedded itself in the camera. When I get paid I’ll get a can of compressed air and blast it into working again. I’m really surprised that I’m not in debt this pay period. If I don’t spend any more money I can so buy my hard drive and my motherboard. Or at least the hard drive and a CD burner. But I think I’m going to have to start paying my insurance at the end of the month, so I’ll need to save a nest egg for that. The beginning payment was huge, if I remember right.

Not much else happened today, Tawna and I went to get delicious bread, then I called my mom and we talked for a while. I’ve decided to straighten my hair. It’s just getting in my way too much. If it was straight I could just put it behind my ear and I wouldn’t be bothered, but it curls up and gets into my face when I try to do that now. I saw a few minutes of the movie version of The Scarlet Letter, its’ complete inability to capture all the nuances of Hawthorne inspired me to start reading it again, but only after I blundered through the wordy and completely superfluous introduction to the Customs-House chapter did I realize that Hawthorne is at best wordy and at worst annoying. I wanted to nostalgically read through this book that I loved, but I can’t. I can only read ten or so pages at a time, like I did when I read it the first time. Titty fuck.

I’ve been rereading my Biology book, mostly out of guilt for not reading it the first time. I need to clean out my binder and put fresh paper in it, I’m going to start teaching myself it again. I hate being forced to learn things, but when I can learn them at my leisure I delve into them with zeal. Oh, last week I finally read Kafka’s “The Penal Colony.” It was so depressing. But I guess I would invite the reader to find a “happy” Kafka work. Well, I guess “The Metamorphosis” is funny, but only satirically so. I wonder if Kafka was an absurdist. Maybe absurdism didn’t exist back then. Labels are always applied posthumously. I watched this great Pinky & the Brain where Brain makes Pinky into an “artist” and they fake him dying so his paintings will be worth millions and Brain can buy an old Soviet nuclear weapon. They never did get the nuclear weapon, but that really isn’t such a big surprise.

I really want to e-mail Kelly, but I just feel like such a traitor since I’ve gotten my job. I’m tied down here, there’s nothing I can do. I can’t see them. It just makes me so sad. But next time I come down there I’m so bringing my computer. My pimpin’ new computer. It will kick so much ass. My computer will be my best friend ever. It’s really sad that when I didn’t have any friends I just retreated into my computer. But I guess I wouldn’t be such a whiz now if I’d had social skills. Ah, just emerged from under the covers. It was getting entirely too hot under there. My mom supposedly sent me a check for $25. It’ll cover gas and then some until I get paid, but it all depends on when it gets here. My mom says it’ll come this weekend, which will work fine. I have a quarter of a tank. After all my hydrocarbonic adventures with Jordan, I’m amazed how little gas I actually use. One time we went to Eureka and I filled up his tank. We had a half tank when we got back, and the next day it was empty. What was he doing? Being an inbred imbecile? Yes. Driving everywhere for no apparent reason? Yes. I have to go all the fucking way from Fort Dick to town every day and he has to go from around Mary Peacock! And yet I use ten times less gas. I guess the only solution to this paradox is that I’m smart (ergo, frugal with my gas) and he’s dumb (ergo, he doesn’t know what the word ergo means.)

I love being judgemental and rude. It just makes my day. Especially when I’m saying it about people who truly deserve it. I sincerely wonder if he reads my blog, and then I realize that he doesn’t care enough about me to read it. He didn’t care enough about me to read Brave New World, he didn’t care enough about me to not fall asleep during Brazil. What a titanic loser. I wonder what (if anything) goes through that “brain” of his. He could easily get on my good side. But no. He’s just dumb. And dumb people stay dumb. It’s just a fact of life. Especially when they’re at that high a level of cretinitude to begin with. That’s so my new word. Cretinitude. Gotta love it.

Oh, guess who I saw at Safeway? Will! Eek! Omg omg omg omg omg I said the funniest thing ever. Me and Tawna were in my car, I was finding a place to park:

Me: Oh, it’s Will! He’s so cute.
Tawna: I like his hair.
Me: I want to take him home.
Tawna: Wouldn’t he mind you taking him home?
Me: Yes, but with ether anything is possible.

LOL! I am the cleverest person ever. God, Toni Braxton just came on my mp3 player. How anti-climactic. She has vocal talent, but she has this inane obsession with ballads, and most of her songs are just so incredibly hackneyed. Maybe she was original when she got her start. Maybe. Ah, Meat Beat Manifesto. They do some amazing things with the synthesizer. I really need to buy one of their CDs. Once I get a real job (i.e. after I’ve finished my college education) I’m so getting all the CDs I crave. Well, I can pretend I’m going to do that. But I’m going to be obsessed with needing to buy a house and all that adult crap. I hope I meet a nice husband. That would suck to die alone like my mom. Well, it was her own fault for picking someone like her father. With me, I go after guys that are the complete opposite of my staid, boring father. I go after guys who always want to be in the limelight (to put it mildly). And I never see it coming until it’s too late. I really want to ask Royce out, but I just…I’m just afraid that he would be all “no.” Or that he would be like “okay” and then it would just kind of die a quick death.

I just can’t see the kind of relationship that I want with Royce. He’s just too tolerant and nice. I want someone who will ascerbically insult people that I don’t like. I want a man to suffocate me with eloquent conversation, to suffocate me with unsaid words, with Hawthorne, with intellectualism. I think I would want to go out with an artist, because I’m not good at painting; it would all balance out. We would both love reading good books, but he could express his angst via pigment and I couldn’t criticize it because I’m no better than him and I could express my angst via prose and he couldn’t criticize it too mordantly. It works in my head. We could live in our loft in New York. Lol. I wish. More like a trailer in Jersey. I do have mediocre money on both sides of my family, but it’s money from work (well, except for on my dad’s side where it was made from my grandma’s life insurance policy on one of her husbands). But anyway, that matters not. Money just flows out the door, but a flow of money from a good job will last for a long time. I need a doctorate if I’m going to get anywhere close to my dream of living in the City.

I can’t really see my dream coming true. But then again I can’t see Bush getting reelected, but it’ll probably happen. Well, he didn’t get elected in the first place, so what are the chances of it happening again, lol. Ouchies! My wrist just started to hurt me. Must go. Oh, I burned OK Go for Tawna, she loves it. Mostly for the song “You’re So Damn Hot” which is so my theme song now.

I guess it was fun…except for my meltdown around lunchtime. I did stay from 11 until 4, five hours. I grossed $35. That’s so a CD burner. I was drooling over some on the net, but decided I should stop because I’ll end up buying one. My online banking says I have somewhere around $100. My mom is sending me some money, so I won’t have to dip into the gas fund until later in the pay period. I bought an extension cord yesterday for my TV and DVD player. I moved them into a new spot. I really don’t know what I’m going to do when I get my new computer up and running…I’m going to have to get a computer desk for it. I hope those aren’t tremendously expensive.

Omg, this dude wrote this letter to the editor making a reference to a “Crusader Rabbit,” who I learned in my research was a 1949 TV character. So now my nickname in the office is Crusader Rabbit.

But that’s far in the future. I’m going to have to relegate the drafting table into the spare room once I get my computer desk, there isn’t enough room for both. I have no idea how I’m going to get it out. Well, I think that there is room, but I would have to move the drafting table and right now that is impossible because I never put wheels on it. That will definitely be a project. A project that I won’t have to deal with for months. Gosh I will really need four hours a day when I have to pay for my insurance. Grr. Well, I hope to have some time to devote to the map thing tomorrow…maybe. Oh, Molly and Kelly e-mailed me but I haven’t gotten back to them because my carpal tunnel thing has really been acting up.

Oh cool, Kelly sent me another e-mail today. She was looking at my archives back when I was down there for the summer. Those really were the days. I wish I could go down there. I just don’t make enough money. Life sucks. I’m going to have to struggle to buy my books for next semester, and I’ll be lucky if my new computer is done within the year. Oh well. I think Tawna and I are going to go down to the store and get some French bread ($1.39!) so I’ll blog later. I must do the 4th of July post, but my wrists just aren’t up to it. I need a computer-free weekend of constantly wearing my brace to get me up to that. Typing all day at work doesn’t help either, but I’m not in excruciating pain there. If I didn’t wear my brace every night I think that I would be.

Oh god, Kevin kept me on the phone for like an hour last night trying to get me to come over or some crap. I was watching fútbol on Spanish TV while eating rice. I love fútbol, it’s so freaking cool. Lithe, delicious guys running around getting all sweaty…yum. Kevin told me he loved me twice. Fucking gross. With all his bullshit, he did inspire me to go over to Royce’s house, but I didn’t…I was too full after eating my rice. I finally have devised a method of innuendo to incite Royce to have sex with me. I’ll ask him to show me his genital piercings. That should work. Maybe. I think that it’s not the actual act of sex that I want to do with him though, I really want to make out with him. I wish he was a druggie so I could wait until he’s high on ecstasy and then make out with him. That would be so kewl!

Well, my wrist is killing me. No more computer for today.

I guess it was fun…except for my meltdown around lunchtime. I did stay from 11 until 4, five hours. I grossed $35. That’s so a CD burner. I was drooling over some on the net, but decided I should stop because I’ll end up buying one. My online banking says I have somewhere around $100. My mom is sending me some money, so I won’t have to dip into the gas fund until later in the pay period. I bought an extension cord yesterday for my TV and DVD player. I moved them into a new spot. I watched The Doom Generation this morning as I got ready for work. I really don’t know what I’m going to do when I get my new computer up and running…I’m going to have to get a computer desk for it. I hope those aren’t tremendously expensive. But that’s far in the future.

Omg, this dude wrote this letter to the editor making a reference to a “Crusader Rabbit,” who I learned in my research was a 1949 TV character. So now my nickname in the office is Crusader Rabbit.

I’m going to have to relegate the drafting table into the spare room once I get my computer desk, there isn’t enough room for both. I have no idea how I’m going to get it out. Well, I think that there is room, but I would have to move the drafting table and right now that is impossible because I never put wheels on it. That will definitely be a project. A project that I won’t have to deal with for months. Gosh I will really need four hours a day when I have to pay for my insurance. Grr. Well, I hope to have some time to devote to the map thing tomorrow…maybe. Oh, Molly and Kelly e-mailed me but I haven’t gotten back to them because my carpal tunnel thing has really been acting up.

Oh cool, Kelly sent me another e-mail today. She was looking at my archives back when I was down there for the summer. Those really were the days. I wish I could go down there. I just don’t make enough money. Life sucks. I’m going to have to struggle to buy my books for next semester, and I’ll be lucky if my new computer is done within the year. Oh well. I think Tawna and I are going to go down to the store and get some French bread ($1.39!) so I’ll blog later. I must do the 4th of July post, but my wrists just aren’t up to it. I need a computer-free weekend of constantly wearing my brace to get me up to that. Typing all day at work doesn’t help either, but I’m not in excruciating pain there. If I didn’t wear my brace every night I think that I would be.

Oh god, Kevin kept me on the phone for like an hour last night trying to get me to come over or some crap. I was watching fútbol on Spanish TV while eating rice. I love fútbol, it’s so freaking cool. Lithe, delicious guys running around getting all sweaty…yum. Kevin told me he loved me twice. Fucking gross. With all his bullshit, he did inspire me to go over to Royce’s house, but I didn’t…I was too full after eating my rice. I finally have devised a method of innuendo to incite Royce to have sex with me. I’ll ask him to show me his genital piercings. That should work. Maybe. I think that it’s not the actual act of sex that I want to do with him though, I really want to make out with him. I wish he was a druggie so I could wait until he’s high on ecstasy and then make out with him. That would be so kewl!

Well, my wrist is killing me. No more computer for today.

Okay, I just overloaded on tedious shit. I’m on lunch, eating a dry PB&J sandwich because I ran out of jelly this morning. There’s so much crap to do! Grr. What is so goddamn ambiguous about “please include a contact number for verification purposes, there is a limit of 400 words.” I fucking swear. And then there’s all the crazy freaks *cough* Richard M. Miles, Cliff Lewis *cough* who think that it’s their duty to write us a letter every day filled with shaky conclusions and half-truths that I have to painstakingly research. I’ve decided today that between the times when their letters have ran (we run a letter from the same person only after two weeks) that all the crazy people letters get put into the Purgatory folder. And of course there’s the people who have no answering machine and never pick up the phone…those are priceless. God damn. Mmm…at least I have one of these gigantic elephantitus apples, they’re HUGE. Yum yum yum. This almost makes the sandwich worthwhile. Oh, I fixed this corrupted picture that Molly sent for Mike, I think I got brownie points. Jennifer was sure impressed. I sincerely doubt that I’ll have time to work on those map things for Mike. He’s kind of getting impatient and wanting them, but it’s really impossible for me to make them in any timely manner only working on them for around an hour a day. Today I’m swamped with work, so I definitely won’t have time to work on them today. He’s giving me more and more stuff, and I really can’t do it all in three hours. I mean, he wanted me to do the picture thing for Molly, call up the fairgrounds and get the fair events. Also, I have to verify all these accursed letters and check them for errors. And he wants me to call all the people who didn’t resubmit their community calendar things and make them resubmit them (the lighthouse and senior center). God, it just totally sucks. But it kind of doesn’t suck, because I’m going to get it done when I get it done. Ah, Mike’s back. I should stop blogging. I’m almost done with my apple.

I just have to bitch about how much the photo on today’s Triplicate sucked. And how much the 4th of July layout sucked. And how someone here just defined fallible as “weak.” It means capable of making a mistake, imbeciles. Okay, I’m done.