heaven’s just a rumor she’ll dispel…as she walks me through the nicest parts of hell
> Nine Inch Nails - Sanctified
> L7 - Shit List
> Placebo - Spite and Malice
> Breeders - Cannonball
> Ramones - Cretin Hop
> Madonna - Physical Attraction
> Orgy - Saving Faces
> Placebo - English Summer Rain
> Ohgr - Earthworm
> OK Go - You’re So Damn Hot
> Hocico - Odio En El Alma
Gosh, so much to blog, so much to blog. This morning was okay, I drugged myself with some NyQuil last night so I could get to sleep (I only do it once in a very long while), so I actually got six hours, to my delight. I woke up early so I could get my laundry done. Let’s see..I already blogged at work so you know about the swank keyboard…oh yeah! I was going to post a pic of it:
It might collapse my links panel, it’s kind of big…but who cares? Convert to 1024×768, my slaves! I know Steve is thinking that 800×600 is the sublime resolution, but I disagree. Well gee, when my monitor can go to 1600×1200 I have to be a resolution whore. Okay, on to the sex and violence, but we must take a detour through wit. We’re reading Oscar Wilde’s The Importance of Being Ernest, and I’m Algernon, the witty libertine cynic. It’s so made for me! I was absolutely gushing as I read the lines!:
Jack: I am sick to death of cleverness. Everybody is clever nowadays. You can’t go anywhere without meeting clever people. The thing has become an absolute public nuisance. I wish to goodness we had a few fools left.
Algernon: We have.
Jack: I should extremely like to meet them. What do they talk about?
Algernon: The fools? Oh! about the clever people, of course.
Jack: What fools!
LMAO!! I would be Oscar Wilde’s SLAVE. He’s the me that I wish I was outgoing and witty enough to be. After class I talked with Molly for a bit in her office, we were both talking about how I’m a perfect Algernon. I totally am. But, alas, there were some people that read their lines like a eulogy. I was just mortified as they trampled the pearls of wit that Wilde labored over. Molly was all “I just wanted to get out of the seat and shake some people and say ‘READ IT WITH MORE EMOTION!’” I totally did too. Amanda didn’t make an appearance, the logical explanation would be that my character and her character had a love scene and she didn’t want to embarass herself, the reality is that she isn’t stable enough to attend any of her classes. Oh, Tawna and I went down to the beach before class, it was really nice. I’m trying to go to the beach more often…just anywhere natural to get away from the college. I mean, the college is nice and all, but sometimes I just need to get away. I love having a car. It totally rocks my crotch. Tawna tells me that Amanda and her mom dropped out of the church. I’m not too surprised. Nothing she does really surprises me any more. The whole flipping off Sammie thing was more sad than anything. I can’t wait until she hits bottom, then we can all get on with our lives. I think she’s pretty close now.
OMG! I totally forgot! John (that red-haired guy from Tawna and Sammie’s math class) totally e-mailed me and asked me for my blog password! W00t. I liked your outfit today (Monday) if you’re reading this. Oh that totally reminds me of something (besides the fact that I’ve been inexorably overusing the word “totally”). I was driving home tonight and about sixty or seventy meters before I got to the road that goes to the beach (that my house borders) I saw this guy that looked totally sexy! He was just walkin’ down the road at like nine-thirty in the dark wearing this emo outfit with a white beanie. I was so tempted to slow down, roll down the window, lick my lips, and utter “Need a ride?” But then it’s times like these where I realize I’ve been watching entirely too much porn. And I never did see his face either. There are no hot guys in Crescent City. Must make this my mantra. Oh, before I forget I have to post my to-do list. I knew I wasn’t going to remember it all unless I made a list, so here it is:
Get check from Becky
Drop art
Cash those checks in the glove compartment
Write English plan
Do play analysis worksheet by Wednesday
Do outline for essay by Wednesday
Take the picture of the Republican Club shirt for the Drift
I’m really depressed that I’m going to look at the clock and it’ll be 11:58 and I won’t have gotten anything done. Well, I clipped my toenails…that used to be on my list. They were hitting the front of my boots. It wasn’t comfy at all. And if I’m about anything, it’s comfort.
I feel so shallow today (as I do many days when I just want to snuggle with cute bois). But I’m going to pretend that I’m not a libertine. For today. Let’s see…that’s around seventy minutes…thank the gods I’m only pretending, I think I’m going to go read some porn. I’m addicted to these stories about these two punks that go around raping people. I know it’s trash, but hey…I find it analagous to Molly’s voracious appetite for vampire sex novels. Punk sex…vampire sex…it’s all the same amount of blood. Gosh, now that I’ve talked about it I’m not even in the mood to read it now. The moment is gone. I’m realizing that my music collection is so incredibly outdated that I can’t stand most of it. I’m downloading some Interpol in a futile attempt to find musical solace. I’m going to try to write my posts in elevated diction so I can work on the tone and style I’ll use for my essays. One person said to me in my Senior year of high school that I sounded “Like a dictonary.” Or was it history book? I can’t remember. I think it was dictionary. I would think it incredibly boring to sound like a dictionary. If they had any class, they would have made it a compliment by saying “You sound like a novel.” But I guess that’s quite ambiguous. I could be “Moonlight Passion” or some other insipid Danielle Steel title or I could be abstruse Baudrillard or magnificently lurid Ballard (who is my definitive god). I’m trying to compile enough songs to fit on a CD, but it’s not really working. I’m downloading more Dandy Warhols and Interpol. Oh, I just checked my downloads folder and Triumph of the Will totally finished. I’m going to use Nero to burn it onto a DVD so I can watch it on my TV. My computer monitor and my TV are about two or three inches different in size…but I can cuddle in my bed to watch the evil Nazis if I burn it onto a DVD.
So I was going to talk about that series of stories I’ve been reading. I kind of stopped reading them since the author didn’t write any new ones, but since we’re talking about tone and style in English 1B I thought I’d talk a little bit about these. If you’re dying to check them out, they’re here, but don’t tell me I didn’t warn you.
But anyway, what was I saying? Oh yeah, we read this story by John Updike called A&P, where he manipulates his tone to the enth degree, making the first-person narrator totally believable and alive. I wish I could manipulate my tone. I think that the author of these stories (who I suspect is well-educated or at least mediocrely educated from the lack of grammatical errors) does this on purpose. There might also be an autobiographical element to the stories too…he might not have the masterful tone I admire, he might just really be an ex-punk. Here’s what he prefaces the stories with:
“There are so many stories I could tell about my friendship with my skinhead
buddy Choke from high school days, so many adventures.
This one I had to think about, whether or not it was something I wanted to
put on paper. But the situation was extreme and intense enough that I’m
sure someone else will find it arousing, so here goes.
Just be warned that there is violence and yes, even some blood involved in
this story, but what else would you expect from a recollection about young
skinheads? Oh yeah, also what basically amounts to rape but what these
days would probably be called “date rape.” Whatever. I had fun. By the
way, at the time this adventure occurred Choke was 17 and I was 16 years
old.”
This is totally a work of fiction, just from his use of the abstract word “skinhead” and his extensive descriptions of their clothes.
“[I] never really paid any attention to him until he came to school
one day dressed like us - tight jeans rolled up so his shiny new boots
showed well, suspenders, and a short-sleeved blue-and-white checkered shirt
over a white t-shirt. But the thing I noticed first was his freshly shaved
head.”
From the extensive descriptions of clothing and later of setting (Choke’s room in particular), this gives the impression that the main audience of the story isn’t other “skinheads,” but random people on the Internet who have a fetish.
Ah, I feel better. I’d been wanting to rant about that forever. I’m still in doubt about the narrator. At times it’s obvious that he’s writing fiction, but other times it seems a genuine autobiographical incident. I’m voting for historical fiction, officially. God damn, it happened. It’s now 11:35. And I didn’t get anything done. Well, tomorrow I hope to get a lot done. I’m going to do all those things on that list tomorrow. I hope.
I just left the wittiest comment on Steve’s blog! (well, at least I think it’s the wittiest), it’s probably just witty because it’s midnight. OMG! Amanda deleted her blog! As if that weren’t predictable. I have all her entries saved. I’m SO glad I saved them. I’m going to host them on my site. I should start work on that so I’m not up till 1 a.m. God this is like the post that never ends. It’s my 1,150th post, it said.
