It’s weird being all tired and unable to form concise, coherent sentences.
I open my mouth and expect something articulate to come out, but no.
Thirty minutes of sleep.
I can only speak in muddled heaps of syllables.
I barely understand what I’m trying to say.
I barely understand what I’m thinking.
I need caffiene.
Ersatz substance D.
Categories: Ennui
Sacrificed six pages of film.
Developing machine wasn’t heated up.
This never happens to me on Saturdays.
I don’t know why.
I just have to wait.
I want to read, but I don’t want to look lazy.
Fuck it.
Listening to Kraftwerk and The Hacker in the morning with no sleep makes for a phantasmagoric realm of caffiene-induced cyberfantasies.
I like it.
Categories: Ennui
I’m at work. At 7 a.m.
It’s my secret.
I’m on Substance D.
Living in my half-awake fantasy world.
I am going to be so fucking tired by the time I start my other job.
Back to fiction.
Without my iPod I wouldn’t have been able to get out of bed.
Technology rocks my crotch.
Must get back to work.
Categories: Ennui
> Kraftwerk – Tour de France (radio version), Radioactivity
> Cassius -Telephone Love
I’ve read about 70 pages of A Scanner Darkly and I finished another section of my algebra while watching some of the more boring Adult Swim shows. The author must’ve totally known some druggies… the dialogue is impeccable and inexplicable. I absolutely love the world of that novel.
I’ve been watching previews of some upcoming movies, and a few of them look like they could be good. I want to see (of course) the film adaptation of A Scanner Darkly and then the Aeon Flux movie. I really don’t think that Charlize Theron can pull off the coolness of Aeon Flux, but I’m sure she can sort of do it halfway, and that’s all I need. The shorts never really made sense at all. I’m sick of how we’re just ripping off the nineties for every single original idea. Oh well. America can’t create art, everybody knows that.
I really should be asleep right now because I have to get up at 6 AM. But I’m talking to Charley, and it’s the first time we’ve talked and forever and I’m totally not tired at all and I feel like getting coked up on Rockstars and pretending they’re Substance D. I’m such a bad person. But I like it.
Ben was online tonight and he had the WebCam on, Charley dared me to view it and he wasn’t having WebCam sex as I suspected, him and that guy Zach were hanging around with sunglasses on and big lights in the background. It’s interesting, since the last time I talked to him he ranted to me about how vacuous Zach was. People like Ben depress me. I wish he would just tell me to go fuck off and die instead of all these ridiculous instant message conversations at two-month intervals. Obviously, he doesn’t want to be my friend. Why pretend? Eh, fuck him. He’s only 17. He has no idea what he wants in this world.
I don’t think I’m going to get to sleep tonight.
Bored. Tired. Horny. Hungry.
Will this life never end?
Categories: jamais vu