Yes, I made it to midnight. A respectable time to go to sleep…considering the ungodly hour at which I had to awaken. The one thing I’m missing is — you guessed it — porn. This distro of linux doesn’t have any audio/video codecs. I can’t even play mp3s, let alone mpeg-4 videos. Please, computer gods, let my new system arrive Monday!
(I won’t leave my room for a week.)
Damn you Fleshbot and your softcore porn!
Can I take him home?
Sometimes I hate being gay. It’s so fashionable and corporate.
I feel like I have to work out and have this gorgeous tanned sex machine of a body so I can go out and find random guys to fuck. That is so not me. Well, it sort of is…and I hate what a stereotype I’ve become. Recently I’ve been having all this sex, but it’s not very hot or satisfying. Fleshbot and all these other sites just reinforce these stereotypes. Well, if I were to read Slashdot, I suppose I would be reinforcing geek stereotypes. I don’t know…it’s just…can we ever escape the images that advertising companies inundate us with? I feel ugly now because I’m not a gorgeous tanned Italian model. What the fuck is that?
I’m going to have to do an Antoine Roquentin:
From Nausea:
“I live alone, entirely alone. I never speak to anyone, never; I receive nothing, I give nothing… When you live alone you no longer know what it is to tell something: the plausible disappears at the same time as the fiends. You let events flow past; suddenly you see people pop up who speak and who go away, you plunge into stories without beginning or end: you make a terrible witness. But in compensation, one misses nothing, no improbability or, story too tall to be believed in cafes.” [14-5]
I should stop being frustrated by my existence and watch some damn Adult Swim.
> Tiga - Burning Down the House
> Felix Da Housecat - Harlot (Intro)
> Massive Attack - Heat Miser
> Nine Inch Nails - Into the Void
This afternoon, Amazon.com sent me an email saying that my Mac Mini has shipped, so I decided to clean off my computer desk.
It always starts with the computer desk.
Three hours later, I had completely cleaned out my closet, sorted out three huge garbage bags of garbage, and completely rearranged and reorganized the crap on the wall that my computer desk faces. I decided on a clean painting/photo motif. I had all this superfluous shit all over the walls and I realized it looked cluttered and tacky.
My new layout is so simple and clean, I’m in love with it. I have so much more room now! And I can see the floor again, which is always wonderful. I would post pics, but unfortunately my new computer isn’t here yet.
Guess what? Thomas canceled our rendezvous. I can’t say I’m shocked. I never really plan on hanging out with him any more. Around when he was supposed to call me I was embroiled in the task of cleaning my room. The thought didn’t even enter my head to stop my task to take a shower and get ready.
I treat flaky people the way one would treat a pathological liar. How pathetic. Whatever. I’m officially bored by Thomas.
He is giving me all this shit about “really liking me” and “missing me”…it seems like such a line. Did I mention that pathological liar thing? Yes? Ah, good. I don’t like having to repeat myself.
So yeah. I have a clean room and it’s only 10:30. Sweet. If I wasn’t exhausted, I might consider calling a friend. Hmm. I wonder what Misty is doing. Eh, what the hell, I don’t have to get up tomorrow. I might as well go out tonight. On second thought, I am really tired. But I need to stay up late so that I sleep away most of Sunday. I hate Sundays most of all. I think religion was invented solely as a way to eradicate the boredom and tediousness of Sundays.
I’ve done all my homework. I’ve washed my clothes. My worst nightmare is to wake up at like 10 a.m. with the yawning void of a boring day ahead of me. Unfortunately, I think that’s exactly what’s going to happen. Damn that 9 a.m. Bio class.
I think I’m going to listen to the latest episode of Gay Sexcapades and surf the web until I pass out.
Today’s research topics:
Interesting. I think it’s time to have some lunch.
