I have a 1GB stick of memory coming second day UPS. W00t!

Now all I need is a putty knife to open my Mac.

And to watch the demonstration video a bunch more times.

I was going to get a super-high-quality module from Crucial, but those are so darn expensive ($150 from NewEgg with shipping). I got my module for $120 with shipping from OWC. And OWC has those handy videos that show you exactly how to discombobulate your computer to get at the memory slots (no small feat, where the Mini is concerned).

I deserve this memory. My mom said she’d pay for it if I passed my classes, and I did. So there. I’m going to have such a speedy machine!!!

Well, I already have a speedy machine, but now I’ll be able to run a whole bunch of programs at once and have it stay speedy!

I’ve been looking for jobs all day today (well, only for like an hour since I got back from work, but still).

I found some nice jobs on Craigslist, but so many of them require a B.A.

I’m glad I’m going to college.

I submitted my passport application today, so in 6-8 weeks I’ll maybe have a passport.

I’m about to talk to this guy TJ from Grants Pass. He seemed cool when I saw his profile, and didn’t delete him…mostly because he had a website. Only cool people have websites.

I don’t like his use of popups and I feel the design is difficult to navigate, but the older iteration of his site was cool. It was down due to a domain renewal hiccup, but it’s back now. It’s cruxpd.com.

I wonder when my domain will need to be renewed..I think it’s this year. Hmm…nope, it’s next year it needs to be renewed. I want to blow $200 and renew it for ten years. That would be sweet, and I would save a bunch of money in the long run. But that’s not exactly at the top of my priority list now.

So yeah. I gave notice.

The thing that really helped me was this technique that I read about in my speech book called visualization, where you picture the whole process going well. And it did go well, I guess. My last day is the 16th.

Unfortunately, I called the cable company and my Internet will get shut off on the 7th. So…I’m going to go a whole WEEK without high-speed Internet.

Save me!

At least it’s over. Now I only have two items on my to-do list sticky note: get an airbag, and sub at the plant this weekend. Weird. I should restart into Windows so I can use my voice-rec to chat with TJ. Farewell, OSX. Oh wait…I deleted my Windows partition. Damn it. I NEED that RAM upgrade. I’m going to get one stick (I need two of matched sizes for optimal performance). Oh hell, I might as well get both and just charge them on my credit card. Is that a bad plan? Yes.

I must not upgrade my RAM until I get a new job. But I can’t deal with this lackluster performance…crap. Okay, I’ll buy one stick. That will double my memory and make my programs faster, but video playback will be impaired because I won’t be running in dual channel mode (for that I need another identical stick). Cool. Time to head over to OWC.com.

I did it.

Whenever my courage failed me, I called my voicemail and listened to that message the Kelly and Becky and Christen left me.

I’m leaving on the 16th.

I tried to give notice today but I totally chickened out. My heart was palpitating and my palms were sweaty and I kept waiting for my boss’s endless meetings to end, but it never happened.

It doesn’t help that we’re in full swing of the election season and everybody in their brother is writing letters to the editor. There are THIRTY letters in the queue that haven’t been published yet. And of course, thirty people that need their hand held that it’s going to work out and yes, indeed, their letter will get published.

I’m not complaining, though. The extra work means that I’m busy, which is a good thing. Tomorrow I’m totally doing it.

Today I discovered the wonder that is Allofmp3.com. I’m not sure of the legality of the site, but I’m sure the WIPO is going to be all over them soon.

In the meantime, for the low, low price of only $10 (and I still have about $3 left in the account, I bought (all these mp3s are high quality 192kpbs MP3s with no DRM):

The Gattaca Soundtrack
The Velvet Goldmine Soundtrack
Mount Sims - Ultra Sex (I’d been trying to find this one for ever)
Tosca - Delhi9 (this cool two-disc album of ambient stuff)

So I went a little crazy. But at around $2 an album, I’m willing to buy much more music than I ever have before. So what if it’s going into the pockets of Russian pirates? Wake up, RIAA bitches. Pirates are COOL. Much cooler than the WIPO.

Earlier this week I grabbed Tool’s Undertow and Lateralus. I’d had Ænima since a few weeks ago, and I have no freaking clue why I stopped listening to Tool. I think it must have been one of those things that got lost between backups or something. They are fucking incredible.

The week before I decided I needed a bit more Bjork, so I got Post (which I LOVE!) and Homogenic, which I’m just starting to listen to. Music is such an addiction to me…I have around 4,000 songs, TV Shows, and Music Videos in my iTunes library…it’s crazy. Anyway, I was in love with Cursor Miner, but I downloaded another of their albums and it was just too…Aphex Twin-ish. I mean, if I want to listen to Aphex Twin I’ll listen to Aphex Twin, but not these cheesy knockoffs. I liked the tounge-in-cheek lyrics about American imperialism in their first album, but I couldn’t take the next album’s musical plaigarism.

Eh, maybe I should give it another chance. It has wonderful album art.

Exhibit a)

Cover art for Explosive Piece of Mind by Cursor Miner.

I started listening to the last Crossover album, Cryptic And Dire Sallow Faced Hoods Blast Off Into Oblivion today at work, and where before I had found the lyrics repetitive and uninteresting, today they seemed fresh and Dada-inspired.

Now I’m listening to Explosive Piece of Mind and I’m liking it. I don’t hear the Aphex Twin yet, but perhaps it’s egregious in some later songs.

I had a realization while I was camping. Entertainment doesn’t lull a populace into intellectual complacency–there has always been entertainment. Americans are just apathetic. Why do you need to care about politics when you’ve got a suburban house and a big SUV? Once the middle class is finally destroyed by the corporate power elite, I think we’ll have some good old-fashioned revolution. Or at least I hope so.

Whoa…there’s the Aphex Twin-ish inspiration in this album…I feel like I’m flying through a virtual world inside my computer. At least, that’s what this soundtrack lends itself to.

Well, my goals for tomorrow include getting my passport and quitting the only job I’ve ever had. Creepy. I’m not sure if I like the new splash page design I made last night, but it’s a lot cleaner and it’s not Flash-based. Now I need to make a clean, simple interface for the other pages that desperately need a redesign, like the about me and portfolio pages. I’m definitely going to need to wait until after the RAM upgrade to do any web design…this thing can’t even run Dreamweaver and Fireworks at the same time. It’s frustrating, to say the least. But I guess it’s also comforting to know that I can pop two little memory modules in there and this thing will run like a dream. That seems like a very long time from now, though.

Everything seems so far away…Sacramento is just a dream. 2GB of memory is just a dream. I can’t make that last step. During that five minutes where my boss was at his desk, my doomsday predictions were flashing before my eyes. I wanted to do it…but I wasn’t ready. And then my boss left his desk. Tomorrow is the day. I’m going to say it as soon as I sit down at my desk.

As I was driving home, I felt like the main reason I didn’t do it was because I wouldn’t be able to pay my bills if I quit right now (not quite true) and I don’t think my dad will actually help me with some money to leave. I really shouldn’t fucking care now. I need to fucking LEAVE.

A few nights ago I had this very peaceful dream. I dreamt that me and Kevin were at this beach where you had to go down these bluffs down this starcase (probably my subconsious represation of Split Stairs, my favorite spot on Pebble Beach). Nothing really happened in the dream, but we were just playing around in the waves and laughing. It was cool. I haven’t done something that carefree in ages. I need to, though.

And it’s 1 a.m. again.

I hate this cycle that my life has turned into. At 1 a.m. I hate this place so much and want to leave, but in the morning everything seems so fresh and new, and leaving it seems like such a terrible derailment of my life. Shit. I’ve got to do this. Tomorrow.

Yes! I just stumbled upon an interview with the guy from Cursor Miner. He is officially the hottest guy ever because of his response to this question:

8. What is your ideal type of woman?

Evil aliens with bass guitars, spiky haired girls who climbed a lot of trees when they were young, librarians who look good sucking the end of a biro, half kenyan half russian art students with a penchant for commodore PETs, Pris from Blade runner, Bjork, the witch out of the lion the witch & the wardrobe, Grace Jones, Amelie, Scheherezade, do they all fit a type? Girltype B21 codename “kiCk Ass”. I don’t know.

Pris from Blade Runner.

Can I marry him now?