the diary of antoine roquentin

This weekend just blew me away.

I mean, I was just going along living my life and then this crazy insane explosion of fun happens. OK. I should probably start at the beginning. I just downloaded all the pictures on my camera for the past like two weeks, so there’ll be copious photos. Hope you enjoy!

OK. The beginning. It all started with two things. One thing was that Christen started dating Allen, one of the main guys that does HorseCow, the famous/infamous indie are gallery that used to be out on West C and 16th. Annie and I would go over there and help them build stuff after they moved to West Sacramento, so we had met before.

We all went out to the Kasbah on Thursday (Annie, Christen, Allen, and I), and we had a great time drinking Sangria and talking.

After that, we went to Una Mas and played truth or dare with Annie’s truth or dare cards. One of the dares I got was that I had to let everyone style my hair. They came up with I Dream of Jeannie-ish style, it was really funny.

After that, we went down to HorseCow and Allen and Steve showed us around the place. We had been there before, but so much work had been done it seemed like a whole new place.

That was a really fun night. The next day, I went to work. I took a picture of my workstation today, for nostalgia I guess. That and I love seeing people’s workstations…I’m weird.

After I got off of work, I met Annie and we (of course) called Christen to see how the rest of the night had gone with Allen after Annie and I had gone home. She told us it was amazing and about this like incredible passionate kiss. We were so excited for her!

After the phone call, Annie and I migrated down towards old Sacramento, and I guess I just felt like there was something there. And there was! This weekend was the Jazz Festival. So we wandered around, got frozen yogurt, and checked out a bunch of the old Sacramento spots that we like. We also scoped out Wilhelmina’s, the bar where the zombie walk will end up. We had the most wonderful afternoon wandering around Old_Sac and the Downtown Plaza.

Annie had a psychic reading and the woman was actually right. It was interesting.

While we were in Old Sac, we tried on wigs at Evangeline’s.

So hardcore. lol

Well, after we had exhausted the area’s wonder, we parted ways. It was uncharacteristically early (like 7 p.m.), but we didn’t have anywhere to put our backpacks (with the new motorcycle jacket I got, the armor can’t be squished down and the thing takes up my entire trunk, where before I could cram in a backpack and my old jacket). I accept the trade-off because it protects me so much better.

I drove home, signed on, and immediately started talking again with Alex. The last week or so I had been talking a lot with this guy Drew, who goes to American River College and messaged me on Facebook saying that I had great taste in movies and music. He has impeccable taste and was turning me on to movies that I hadn’t ever even heard of. However, I didn’t get a real big relationship vibe from him. I mean, I guess there were undertones of it, and I thought he was a pretty cool guy, but I wasn’t tremendously interested in much but friendship.

Drew and I were doing personality profiles a few days ago, and I had logged on to my OK Cupid account (yes, I know, lame, but Christen had met the most adorable guy on it) to find the results of the personality test there, which was the one he was referring to. I had a message in my inbox. “Who the hell could this be from?” I thought, expecting it to be some kind of spam.

“Have you ever…” was the subject line.
Inside, it continued “…been so fascinated by someone.” He wrote that he had seen my profile and been blown away, and his AIM name. it looked familiar, so I checked my iChat logs, and he had been instant messaging me. However, I had thought it was one of the myriad screen names of someone I was avoiding talking to, so I had ignored them.

I wrote back saying that his profile was awesome (which it was), and I was amazed that we had such similar interests. So flash to Friday after I got home from hanging out with annie. I started talking with Alex on iChat. And talked. And talked. We started an iChat AV conference (he is so much more of a Mac geek than me, it’s amazing), and we iChatted for six hours. Until about 5 a.m. We were both snuggled under our covers talking to each other on video. I just don’t even know what to say about him. He is just fucking amazing. We talked about the Sacramento scene, our perceptions of the San Francisco scene… I don’t even remember but it just felt like I’d known him for years.

Oh I remember what we did, we checked the compatibility of our signs. He’s a Virgo, and I’m a Scorpio. Yes, I know, I am the penultimate atheist, but astrology is a fun way to look at things. That and Megan is beyond obsessed with it.

Astrology says that we are extremely compatible. And it sure felt like that. It still feels like that.

After Adrian, I had just been burned up inside. I was ashes. I had gone through everything, I had tried as hard as I could to make it work through force of will alone, and I had failed. But the most amazing thing happened when I started talking to Alex. I could see things begin to grow under the ashes, flowers and creeping vines taking hold in the rubble. The sun came out again, and the forest started to live again. I never thought it could happen. I never thought the winter would be over. But it is. I just feel like my heart is going to explode out of my chest. It’s my worst fear to die inside. I thought Adrian had done it, but he didnt.

I don’t need him any more.