dinner party!
Terry and I went over to Brian’s house tonight and had this amazing delicious pasta that Brian made. While we were eating we watched the Family Guy Star Wars episode, it was SO funny.
It was kind of (okay, VERY) awkward that I was cracking jokes about being horny…I shouldn’t have done that. But I can’t not talk about issues when I’m with Brian…and when Terry’s there it makes it kind of weird. Okay, very weird.
I think we had a good time though, we watched that horrible Tori Amos video where she looks like Sinbad:
It is the most disturbing video you will see this week. And definitely the only one where someone will be trying to make dressing like a pirate look cool.
So I guess Terry and I are OK. He’s going to try to be more affectionate and I’m going to instigate more cuddling. I mean, it’s not the sex that is the problem, it’s the feeling of closeness. And not only were we not having sex, we were like sleeping on opposite ends of the bed. He was trying to make me think that’s OK, but I don’t think so.
He’s trying to say that the end result of being “married” or whatever, being in a long term relationship, is two people sleeping on opposite sides of a bed. I don’t think that’s true at all. I mean, are you with me on this? Am I just a needy bitch ’cause I like to cuddle a lot?
Lame.
Well, I should get to sleep. It’s nearly one and I have a big test tomorrow in my geology class (which I haven’t studied for at all, thanks to my wonderful procrastination habits). A lot of the time I feel like I’m just waiting for us to have sex, which is a terrible feeling.
Well, he is in a lot of pain…I should be more patient.
It’s time to go to sleep.
21 years together, we cuddle constantly. But he also brings me coffee and wine, and cooks every night. I know I have an unusual spouse, but I call him my battery charger. He gives me the energy to be more giving and loving in return. I have this theory that you just get so tired that you have nothing left to give to others. So someone has to be selfless enough to initiate it so everyone is recharged.
Granted, there were some nights when either he or I passed out exhausted from work - but we always woke up in eachother’s arms. Sleep cuddling is the best thing ever.
I don’t think it ever should go away. Not unless there is something major going on that takes priority over the cuddles.
I know my weird fucked up relationship is not one to model…but we always cuddle. every night, even when were mad at each other. In the beginning there was this issue about not having sex every night and how cuddling made him hot, but I gave him a lot of space and showed him how fun/relaxing/sexy/energizing it could be. I think you should give Terry a little space to learn how to be comfortable with this things, just as he should give you space to learn how to not crave these things so much. Meet in the middle.
I see how much you are really into Terry and I don’t think you’ll cheat on him. You shouldn’t, even if I’m a terrible role model.
AND you should both go outside of your comfort zones of “how do I show this person I love them?” and do things you wouldn’t normally do. Maybe once in a while you can pick him some flowers and he could wait in the freezing ass cold and take the bus to your house. again, I don’t think there is enough compromise.
Don’t feel like a douche either. these are valid complaints.
LOVE YOU