Today wasn’t so bad. I worked all day, met Andrew for coffee…drove to Sam’s place. We hung out and watched Salad Fingers.

I often forget that Sam gives good advice. Hm.

Considered calling Patrick today, but ultimately decided against it.

I feel like like everyone’s pulling me from every direction and I can’t decide who I want. I mean, the answer has always been Andrew, but I feel like it’s going to complicate things.

Zero is like totally in love with me and won’t understand that we will never date.

I feel like at this point in my life I don’t want to be in a relationship… but I do want to be with Andrew in some way. I feel like it’s this roulette wheel of who I am most annoyed with.

Waiting to be betrayed.

Friends aren’t really talking to you, they are just gathering dirt to use later. I really need to hang out with Annie more. I had no idea how right she was.

I think I just need to accept that dating Andrew might leave me friendless.

I just have so many problems saying no. I want to make everyone happy… not for other people’s sakes but my own. I don’t know.

I should just be like Terry and have a new best friend every month. Or be like Mario and have no actual friends.

The only friend that really give me any useful advice is far far away in 1971.

I wish she would come back.

Once trust is lost it can never be regained, I guess.

In lighter news, we are going to the My Life With The Thrill Kill Kult show on Sunday, which should be super-exciting.

I don’t want to be a Brian, jumping from sinking ship to sinking ship and never taking the time to think about my future. Unlike him, I won’t settle.

Speaking of the future, I have been looking at colleges and it turns out that Sacramento State doesn’t actually have a web design degree. They offer a graphic design degree but that’s it. So I went to the College Board website and did some searches and there are a lot of schools that offer a comma trouble is they all have tuition of like $20,000 a semester.

I called my dad today and talked with him for awhile and apparently he told me that he would pay $10,000 or so for my first semester at Sacramento State.

I’m really trepidatious about going to the damn school. I did some research and of the 100 people that applied for the graphic design program only 40 were accepted. And you have to take 30 credits before that. And I don’t even want to be a graphic designer. Bullshit. I don’t know what to do. Take out a huge loan and go to some school that costs $40,000 a year? I just don’t think I’d be able to do that. Who just hands out $80,000 loans?

Anyway, I’m supposed to be at the office super early tomorrow, so I’m going to try to sleep.